Right, so the cavalry have packed up and headed home for a brief spell last night. It was awesome to have my mom around as this week has been unpredictable with regard to pain. Some days really bad and others no pain at all. I am continuing with the Rife treatments in order to build my immune system in preparation for chemo. Mom was a blessing helping out with the household chores and looking after Rhiannon.
In the meantime, I have had another session with the German therapist which brought up a lot of pent up anger and unspoken, forgotten emotions relating to past relationships. The release was huge and came in the form of much pain and depression, lots of crying. The release itself was not fun, but the feeling after was indescribably lovely.
I’ve also been given the go-ahead for chemo. My first treatment on is scheduled for 2 April just after the long Easter weekend. I am apprehensive but not nervous. I still see this as yet another tool on my road to recovery. If I look at it any other way I will defeat the object.
On the whole, I have been feeling what I can only describe as grateful. A lot of things are coming together in my life and seem to be making a lot more sense. I wake up each day with a background feeling of excitement that this is a new day with a new challenge and one day / step closer to perfect health.
I have chopped most (not all) of my hair off in preparation for chemo. I now have a short bob after 11 years of having very long hair. It’s a huge change but it feels great, like a huge weight has lifted off me. When my hair eventually falls out, I will invest in wigs and plan to have lots of fun with those. The reaction to my new hair has been awesome.
Everyone thinks it looks cool so that’s also added to my general sense of well-being. In short, things are good right now. I am relaxing on the long Easter weekend with friends and family. Tuesday looms but no longer with the sense of dread or horror which I previously felt towards chemo. I will keep you all updated.